Teach Mom Learn

Can we just take a moment to talk about how exhausting life has been for the last few years? It’s like since March of 2020, there has been a constant barrage of unimaginably horrible news, evolving health guidance, and uncertainty. And it’s no wonder we’re all very close to some serious burnout.

Living in these conditions has put us all in a constant state of anxiety. The lack of consistency makes it impossible to plan anything, and it feels like we’re always waiting for the next crisis. Throw in obscene levels of inflation with stagnating salaries, and it’s no wonder everyone is holding on by a gossamer thread.

And yet, somehow, we’re supposed work, parent, survive, and thrive in this environment. So when we’re not at work, we’re pouring our energy into creating some semblance of normal for our kids. I know I normally try to keep it upbeat on this blog, but let’s be real -I’m tired. And you’re tired too.

So what do we do? The world isn’t changing anytime soon, and the causes of our stress will likely stick around for a while. Does that mean we’re going to have to live in this heightened state of anxiety forever?

The answer is a definitive no, and it’s not just because living at this level of stress is not sustainable. It’s also because we’ve made it through 2 years of this, which proves we’re strong and resilient.

What we need now are strategies that we can use everyday to stay grounded and avoid total burnout. Here are 10 you can use today!

1. Find a creative outlet

Creating something can be a powerful way to regain control and channel stress into productivity. Activities like painting, baking, and crocheting can be so helpful because not only are you doing something relaxing, you’re creating something new.

I bake when I’m stressed. There’s something about piling together a bunch of ingredients and watching them become something incredible that makes me feel like I can breathe again. And as an added bonus, I get to feed the people I love.

With endless options for YouTube tutorials and blogs, there’s no reason not to try that hobby you’ve always secretly wanted to learn. Give yourself the opportunity to create something because you want to, not because you have to.

2. Take a break from scrolling

Designate a time each day to put your phone down. The longer you can do this, the better off you’ll be. The news is depressing, social media is a comparison trap, and worst of all, our phones take our attention away from the ones we love.

Leaving your phone in a different room can really help you break your scrolling habit. I leave mine on loud so I know if someone is trying to reach me, and then I won’t be tempted to check it and accidentally fall into a scrolling trap.

3. Get outdoors

This is going to be my advice for almost anything, but there’s a good reason -getting outside is healing! Nature is peaceful and beautiful, and feeling the warm sun on your face will make you feel so much better.

Many studies show that spending time outdoors can boost your mood. This article from the American Psychological Association explains the many benefits of time outdoors. Even half an hour a day makes a huge difference.

Especially in the winter, it’s easy to get in the habit of staying inside. Challenge yourself to get out even if it’s cold or grey, even if it’s just for a short period of time. It might just give you the reset you need!

4. Take time to yourself

This is a really hard one for moms, but it is essential. You need to take time for yourself. It could be when you need it, or it could be a standing mani pedi appointment every weekend.

Talk to your partner and figure out a time each day for each of you to be on your own. Or if your partner can’t help, get creative.

Today, my daughter fell asleep in the car on the way home. She gave up her nap about 2 weeks ago, so I sat there for 5 minutes eating Girl Scout cookies and scrolling through Instagram. And it was amazing and exactly what I needed to propel me through the rest of the day.

Even though you likely need way more than 5 minutes to recharge, sometimes 5 minutes is all it will take to give you the burst of energy you need to get to real rest.

Find a way to get those 5 minutes. Hand your kids your iPad or sit in your car and do what you need to do to feel like yourself again.

5. Reach out to a friend who understands

Friends who understand you are a gift, and when you’re overwhelmed and on the verge of burning out, they’re exactly who you need.

I’m a teacher who married a teacher, and together, we have tons of teacher friends. The luxury of being able to complain about the frustration of specific work issues without having to spend 20 minutes bogged down in explaining the complexities of the situation.

Your friends who get it will know exactly what you’re talking about, be able to empathize with you, and can offer valuable solutions and perspectives.

That’s not to say that others with different experiences don’t have value because they definitely do. But sometimes, especially when you’re *thisclose* to losing it, you just need someone who gets it.

Seek out those people, confide in them, and be grateful you have them. And be ready to support them just as well the next time they need you!

6. Let something go

Chances are there is something in your life that you don’t actually have to do. So don’t. Let whatever it is go and free up more time for what matters to you.

Get your groceries delivered instead of spending time in the store. Say no to optional responsibilities at work. Do what you absolutely have to and nothing more. You’ll be surprised by how much time it frees up.

7. Designate a weekly rest night

As busy, working moms, we have very little downtime. Throw in household chores, a side hustle, kids fighting bedtime, and it seems like there’s no time off.

Pick one night every week and make it your night off. Put your kids to bed, then do something exclusively for you. Scroll on your phone for hours if you want. Watch a movie with your SO or tell them you want to spend the night watching Real Housewives by yourself.

Don’t do chores, let someone else make the lunches for tomorrow (or prep them in advance), and take a few hours for yourself because you need it.

8. Find the right binge watch

Similar to how you match your playlist to your mood, having a rotation of binge watches based on different emotions is helpful.

Some days -honestly, maybe most days -you need something lighthearted and easy, like The Big Bang Theory or The Office. Others you may need Grey’s Anatomy or This is Us to trigger a good cry.

I remember at the beginning of the pandemic, the only thing that made me relax was the intense suspense of Dirty John. The key is to read your mood and watch something that will give you the emotional input you need to cope with your day.

9. Shift your mindset

I wish I could remember where I read this recently, but I saw something somewhere about the power of shifting your mindset from “I have to” to “I get to.” It resonated because as working parents, there is so much we have to do every day and it’s exhausting.

I’m not saying every part of the day is a privilege. But if you can start by finding just a few “have to’s” and converting them to “get to’s,” it will make a big difference in how you tackle your day.

Some get to’s are easy to find. Any excuse to hug or play with your child, slipping into your cozy bed, spending time with loved ones, doing something to help others -those are all get to’s. Even your have to’s have some element of get to within them.

For example, I dread changing Rae’s diapers. I honestly don’t care about the mess, it’s more that she hates diaper changes and it breaks my heart to see her so upset by something so necessary. Changing the diaper is a have to.

Blowing raspberries on her little belly or letting her pick a treat for after we’re done? Those are the get to’s. And those are something to look forward to!

10. Treat yourself every single day

Getting through an insane day is easier when you have something to look forward to. Similar to how you make sure you always have your kids’ favorite snacks, make sure you have food, treats, and activities you enjoy in your house every single day.

Right now, as someone who is 6 months pregnant, I look forward to a serving of ice cream every single night. Sometimes it’s a glass of wine (when I’m not pregnant, of course!), a brownie, or a favorite episode of a really good show.

Having something to look forward to that’s just for you will make the day so much easier to get through.

For more self-care, check out these 9 self-care activities you can share with your toddler and these 50 ways to treat yourself for less than $50.

How do you avoid burnout? Please share in the comments below!