Teach Mom Learn

Social narratives are one of my favorite teacher tools. They are easy, effective ways to prepare your child (or anyone, really) for situations that are new or nerve-wracking. I am so excited to share this strategy with you!

A social narrative is the generic term for social stories, a strategy created and trademarked by Carol Grey. Social narratives are designed to help individuals with autism prepare for new, potentially anxiety-producing situations using clear, positive, and directive language.

We unknowingly use social narratives all the time. Have you ever been uneasy about attending an event, so you run through what you will likely experience in your head? This scripting helps us feel more prepared and more in control, which reduces our anxiety.

I’ll give you an example: I hate getting my blood drawn. Any time I go to a doctor’s appointment where a blood test will be necessary, I walk myself through it.

I know that I will go to the lab, sign in, wait in the chair, be greeted by the phlebotomist, go to the chair, sit down, and close my eyes tightly. The phlebotomist will take my hand, extend my arm, put a tourniquet on it, feel for a vein, and insert the needle. I will not look at my arm. Instead, I will think about something that makes me happy. When the phlebotomist is done, she will remove the needle from my arm, press a cotton ball to it, and secure it with surgical tape. Then, I will treat myself to a Starbucks latte on the way home.

Because I know what’s coming, I can approach the blood test with less anxiety than if it were completely new and unfamiliar. And that’s the exact purpose of a social narrative.

Who benefits from social narratives?

Although they are most frequently used for individuals with autism, social narratives are beneficial for everyone, especially children. So much of what a child experiences is new, and it’s common for them to feel nervous when they don’t know what to expect.

Social narratives can be useful for adults too. While we’re unlikely to use them in a formalized way, running through what to expect in an anxiety-producing situation, whether by yourself or with others, is a helpful strategy.

How to write a social narrative

According to Carol Grey, social stories have 7 essential components. This article from Special Learning, Inc. details each of the key components of a social story. When I write social narratives for my students, I tend to be a bit more casual.

The most important elements of a social story are to accurately and concisely describe the situation your child will encounter, to normalize the feelings they will experience, and to present coping strategies they can use to navigate these experiences effectively.

Social narratives are easy to make at home. Follow the steps below to make one for your child:

1. Start by describing the experience

Think through all the steps of your child’s new experience. Make sure the list is comprehensive so that your child is not likely to be surprised.

Use the following guiding questions to help you:

• What will they do?
• Who will they see?
• Where will the event take place?
• How will your child feel?
• What are some strategies your child can use if they feel nervous?
• How are they expected to act during this experience?
• What will happen after the experience is over?

2. Tell the story from your child’s perspective

Social narratives are meant to be told from the point of view of your child. By telling the story from the first-person perspective, you’re enabling your child to connect with it more. As they read, they can imagine that they are actually experiencing the activity you’ve described.

3. Use real pictures

Good social narratives have strong visual supports. You can take pictures of the people and places involved in your child’s experience. If you have the opportunity to do a practice run, or if you’re working to create a resource for a scary situation your child will face repeatedly, consider using pictures of your child completing each step.

By using real images, you’re making the situation more familiar for your child. And by letting your child help you make the story by acting out the steps, you’re giving them a sense of control over a situation that may not be controllable. Posing for the pictures will be interactive and fun, which will help to reduce your child’s anxiety even more.

4. Keep it short and to the point

A social narrative should not be a long story. Only essential information should be included. Too many details will be overwhelming for your child and detract from the purpose of the social narrative.

5. Use specific language, and keep it positive or neutral

There is a huge difference between between saying “On Tuesday, I have to go to the dentist” and “On Tuesday, I will go to the dentist.” The use of “have to” implies that going to the dentist is something to dread. While this may be the case, reinforcing this idea in what is meant to be a coping strategy is not helpful.

Your goal is to present the facts to your child, not to insert your own opinions. When you talk about events, use neutral language to describe the steps. If you’re discussing people, feel free to add in some positives (e.g., “My dentist’s name is Dr. Smith. She is nice and friendly.”) to make your child feel more at ease.

Focus on details that you know will help your child feel more comfortable. If your doctor’s office has a jungle mural and your child loves tigers, mention the mural in your narrative so they can look forward to seeing it.

Don’t shy away from discussing your child’s emotions. For example, if you’re going to the airport and your child is nervous about being scanned by the TSA agents, normalize the emotion and include a coping skill.

You could say something like, “I might feel nervous when I go through the x-ray machine, and that is okay. I can take deep breaths and count to 10 so I feel calm.”

Labeling these emotions and giving them coping skills helps your child to be even more prepared for what this new or stressful experience.

6. As your child gets older, leave blanks

When your child is able to label their emotions, it is helpful to leave blanks in the story. The blanks are most effective in places where feelings and coping strategies will be discussed. As you and your child read together, you can encourage them to think about how they might feel as they go through their new experience.

Then, you can work together to identify some helpful coping skills. You can also discuss why their feelings are completely normal and nothing to be embarrassed about.

I hope this post gave you some ideas for how you can start using social narratives with your child. If you need some help getting started, email me at teachmomlearn@gmail.com. I’m happy to help! And please share your experiences with social narratives in the comments below. I’d love to hear how they work for you!

For more teacher strategies you can use at home, check out these easy ways to teach your child growth mindset, or these techniques to help defuse your toddler’s meltdowns.